


Bokuto - Angel

by jadehqknb



Series: The Good Ship Yachi [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Emo Bokuto, Established Relationship, F/M, and loves him so much, because I had a bad day when I started this, but yachi is a sweet heart, he's having a bad day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-24
Updated: 2018-07-24
Packaged: 2019-06-15 08:57:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,051
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15409488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jadehqknb/pseuds/jadehqknb
Summary: Bokuto's had a bad couple of days...





	Bokuto - Angel

Bokuto rolls to his side, away from the glare of sunbeams sneaking their way through the cracks in his blinds. He really should get curtains—dark black ones to shut it out, to shut everything out. But he know that darkness, as much as he wants it, won’t calm the turmoil raging in him, won’t silence the voices of his inner demons that constantly scream in his head.

_ No good, not enough, dumb, stupid, ugly, pathetic, waste of space, waste of time, why even try? _

A groan rumbles out of him, his head aching because of course he would go and make things worse by drinking way too much last night, by himself. 

Alone. He feels so alone, lost in a sea of expectations and demands. He hates feeling like this—the impotence, the neediness. It feels like drowning, like being suffocated by his own hand. Why is he like this? Why can’t he be stronger? 

He hears the door open but ignores the first call of his name; maybe she’ll just leave. 

That would be for the best. Not for him, but for her. 

He’s not good enough for her, a fact he’s constantly reminded of whenever they get together with her old team. Sure, they smile and they shake hands and there’s some jokes, some laughter, but he can see it in their eyes, can hear the inflections they think they’re hiding; as much as they like him, they don’t like him being with her. 

Tears prick at the corners of his eyes and he buries his face to hide them as the bedroom door opens. 

“Kou?” Yachi’s voice is soft, as though she isn’t sure whether he’s asleep or not nor if she should wake him. He could try pretending, to feign sleep until she goes, but he knows her, knows she’s worried just by that one intonation of his name. 

The bed dips slightly under her weight and he can’t stop the wince at her gentle touch. She sighs and he feels his heart grow heavier. She must be so tired of this, tired of him, tired of—

She wraps her fingers around the curve of his broad shoulder and tender, meek Yachi pulls firm, rolling him away from the wall until he’s on his back, his face towards the ceiling. 

He keeps his eyes closed, stubborn and prideful even in his wretchedness, but she doesn’t say anything, just softly trails the backs of her dainty fingers from the crest of his forehead down, following the line of his face, caressing the soft of his cheek. Her fingers uncurl as she reaches his jaw, tracing its curve. 

Her touch sends pleasant tingles down his neck, small goosebumps rising as she stimulates the nerves. He can’t hold back a soft sigh, leaning into her touch as her hand cradles the side of his face. Finally his eyes open, meeting hers that are filled with concern, patience and above all else, love. The tears start flowing; he can’t hold them back anymore. With a shuddering intake of breath, he leans up, wraps his arms around her and buries his face in her neck. “I’m not… I’m such a mess. Why are you with me?”

Yachi doesn’t say anything, just smooths over the back of his flattened, greasy hair without complaint and lets him hug her, lets him cry and soak the cap of her sleeve, gives cooing noises of reassurance. 

He’s sobbing now, letting loose all the gunk that’s plagued him for two days, and still she sits, quiet but with intent, rubbing up and down his strong, wide back that shakes under the power of his pain. 

When he’s quieted down, falling to sniffles and pulling away, he knows he looks a fright but she smiles; soft, gentle, warm, true. No malice, no annoyance, nothing but acceptance and support. 

Finally she speaks, “How about you go take a shower? You’ll feel better, I promise.”

He nods and she moves to make way for his legs to swing round from the mattress to the ground. He stumbles a bit, still hung over but more lucid than before, and heads to the bathroom. The water is hot, splashing against aching muscles, warming his skin that he’d not realized till then had gotten so cold. He washes his hair, scrubbing his scalp roughly, but it feels good. 

The shower isn’t a miracle worker, but Yachi is, having stayed behind in his room to change the sheets, throw out the garbage and open the blinds, letting the light in. It streams around her, dancing off her golden hair, and he wonders again what she sees in him. 

She turns at his entrance, gives him a smile and pats the bed. Usually at that he would be teasing, giving her bedroom eyes and making her blush but not today. He complies, lies down heedless of his wet hair on his pillow, and looks up at her. He’s shirtless, only clad in loose grey sweats, and the sheets feel heavenly against his skin. 

“You bought new?” he asks, only now noticing they aren’t a color he recognizes. 

She nods, again seating herself beside his prone form, hand tracing patterns over his chest, and he sighs. 

“Just relax. Don’t worry about anything; I’m here,” she says quietly, leaning forward and pressing a chaste kiss to his lips. His hand finds the back of her head, drawing her back to him. Her kisses usually invoke his heat, stoke his fire until he wants to burn them both with his passion, but today they are life, they are reassurance, they are more than he ever realized and he wonders why so often he has to fall into pits to see the truth of the lights in his life. 

The kiss breaks, and they’re both breathing a bit faster but she pushes him to his side and lays down behind him, caressing his back up and down, up and down until he’s lulled into a twilight slumber. Her breath tickles his ear as she whispers, “I love you, Koutarou, and I’m not going anywhere.” 

He sighs, lets go, and relapses into sleep. 

He’ll probably always have his demons, but he has his angel by his side.

And at the end of the day, that’s all that really matters. 

  
  



End file.
